LAS VEGAS - Reportedly, God parlayed a $160 bet into more then $30,000 last Saturday betting on college basketball at the Mirage in Las Vegas and then gave the money away. Although the hotel would neither confirm nor deny the reports, witnesses claim that an elderly man came in early in the day and made eight separate bets all of which he won. He then gave the money to a young couple who had reportedly lost everything to that same casino.
"At first I thought it was just some old guy, he wasn't dressed no different then most, he had this long white beard, though" said frequent sports gambler Harry Porter. "But then he came on over and said he forgave me. I'm like, 'Whatever?', but then I got this warm, calming feeling as he walked away. Later I heard he hit on St. John's over Duke and Bama over Tennessee….both of them, I mean, c'mon."
Besides correctly picking those two upsets, God apparently also picked six other winners, all in college basketball, putting twenty dollars on each game.
Some have expressed doubts, wondering why God would participate in such an activity, as gambling is fairly commonly considered to be an activity that God does not approve of. Religious scholar Professor Thomas Chernoff , however, claimed there was no contradiction. "I mean, isn't really gambling if you know the outcome, now is it?"
The young couple he gave the money to, Dan and Lori Trident, released a single statement, "We want to thank God for all he did for us today." However, an Uncle close to the couple said they had been in financial straits with their sick daughter, Melanie, and that maybe they had gone to Vegas hoping to ease their burden.
The obvious act of mercy by God was surprising only in the fact that "it was done so openly. Normally, God works in mysterious ways. But there was no mystery in this. I guess that is pretty mysterious in and of itself, why he acted so un-mysteriously," noted Chernoff.
©2000 Copyright David Oliver
DISCLAIMER: These stories are not true. No really. It's all just a joke, you know for fun.
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