ORLANDO, FL - Much maligned Braves pitcher John Rocker got some rare good news this week when an arbitrator reduced his suspension of Rocker by more then half to just fourteen days. Rocker drew the ire of Major League Baseball, fans and even non-fans when he made remarks insensitive to minorities, foreigners and others.
Rocker has tried to express his contrition several times, but to at least one Braves fan it is still not enough.
"I just don't know how I can, in good conscience, go to the games in my fake ceremonial headdress and do the tomahawk chop as long as John Rocker, with his intolerance of other races and cultures, is still on the team," explained longtime Braves fan Margaret Levingsworth.
Commissioner Bud Selig expressed his disappointment over the Commissioner's decision, noting that baseball has a special social responsibility and a long history of being in the forefront of tolerance.
Chief Wahoo, the Cleveland Indians smiling Native American mascot, agreed, "I think baseball does serve a purpose in being a model for others to follow and I applaud the Commissioner's efforts in this regard. I think he was right to suspend Rocker like he did. Oh, and by the way, when the Commissioner has some free time I would like to talk to him."
Meanwhile, Rocker joined his Brave teammates for Spring Training, many of whom earlier had expressed their own distaste for Rocker's remarks. But many have expressed a desire to forgive and move on. "Dude can pitch like a mother, so who cares," noted Braves pitcher Mike Maddux. It remains to be seen whether or not the fans will be so forgiving.
©2000 Copyright David Oliver
DISCLAIMER: These stories are not true. No really. It's all just a joke, you know for fun.
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