Quantum Leap Provides Tying Goal in Flyers Victory
PHILADELPHIA, PA - The Physics community is still buzzing over John LeClair's tying goal in Friday's Stanley Cup Playoff game over the Buffalo Sabres. LeClair's second period shot, coming from the right of Sabre goaltender Dominik Hasek, apparently went through the netting and into the net providing the Flyers with the game-tying goal.
According to Temple Physics Professor Edward Quickly, "The shot was taken with such force and velocity that the puck entered into a quantum netherland, allowing it to pass through, from a state on the outside of the net to a state on the inside of the net. The odds of that happening are incalculable, but apparently not impossible."
Quantum physics, although quite complicated, states simply that at the smallest levels, matter works in a completely probabilistic and discrete way. This has allowed for interesting possibilities, although only in theory, of time travel, parallel universes and matter jumping in space. For the latter to happen several things have to happen exactly right, the likelihood of which is very small.
Until now, that is. What was once the realm only of science fiction writers and purely academic physicist has found validation in the NHL.
Hasek, however, was not so sure that anything remarkable had happened, "I am pretty sure it just went through a hole in the net. It should not have counted."
LeClair, although not disputing that he made a major scientific advance, did not acknowledge it either, "I don't care, as long as it counted and we won."
As for the academic community, "It is very exciting," commented Quickly. "But there is still a lot of research to be done before this can be practically used. Hopefully we can work more closely with the NHL and maybe other leagues. I can see how this can be useful in all other sports. Pitchers for example could pitch right through bats. Yes, it is very exciting."
©2000 Copyright David Oliver
DISCLAIMER: These stories are not true. No really. It's all just a joke, you know for fun.
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