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Notre Dame Leads Nation in Rudy Recruitments
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SOUTH BEND, IN - The storied Notre Dame University football program, in order to try and revive their flagging success, have increased their recruitment of undersized players named Rudy.
Bob Davie admitted this in a recent press conference, "We felt most of the undersized Rudys were going to other colleges. We decided that we needed to be more active in getting them to come back to Notre Dame."
Recruiting undersized kids named Rudy to play defense proved quite successful for Notre Dame in the 1970's. Probably the height of Rudy recruiting came in 1976 when an undersized Rudy Reuttiger inspired his teammates with a late tackle of in the late stages of the last game of the season in his only appearance when the outcome was not in doubt.
The story of his exploits and how they lifted the Fighting Irish were immortalized in a 1993 film, Rudy. Apparently after watching the movie for five days straight Bob Davie came to the conclusion that Notre Dame's lack of success lies in the fact that they have no smallish players named Rudy on the team.
At the press conference Davie announced that Notre Dame had already successfully recruited two Rudy's.
"Rudy Lawton is five foot six- inches and one hundred sixty-five pound of pure heart. I am going to try and fit him in at offensive tackle."
"And then there is Rudy Miller out of Allentown, Pennsylvania. We are very excited because he is especially undersized at only five foot three inches. We are hoping he can come in a be our starting quarterback."
Davie also added that they have signed a give foot five-inch linebacker Joseph Rudeski from Plymouth, Michigan. As Davie noted, "We are hoping to shorten his last name to Rudy, at least on a nickname basis. My assistants are going to be working with him on that when practice starts."
Bobby Bowden of Florida State was not worried, although his undersized Rudy count is minimal. "No, I don't think we will be going out of our way to recruit small players named Rudy."
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©2000 Copyright David Oliver, All Rights Reserved
DISCLAIMER: These stories are not true. No really. It's all just a joke, you know for fun.
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